Thursday, April 5, 2012

Ode to Waxing

So you have to forgive me a little bit.  But waxing has been on my mind A LOT lately.  You may find this odd.  Or say "what in the heck does this have to do with living aboard?" 
I need to start this by explaining that from about 14 years old to my mid twenties I produced a very large amount of testosterone. Lots of blood tests were run, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But it was basically just me, and they figured that I'd grown out of it. Now if you know me, this explains a lot. I have a temper, I'm one of those people that "see red". Now as I've gotten older, it has decreased and I no longer have to beat the ever living crud out of punching bags or save up empty pickle jars so that I can break them on the driveway whenever I'm trying to let out my frustration. I rarely ever feel the need to rip someone’s head off, spit down their neck, and then shove the head upside down as far south as I can. Rarely ever ;)
But the side effect that I hate the most, has been the man beard hair that lived on my legs. I'm not kidding. My leg hair used to scare small children, large children, heck large adults. I've been known to make a tire go flat by accidentally brushing against it on a summer day after not having shaved for 2 days. It used to be bad, ask anyone.

"So you have thick and dark leg hair, so what?"
Well the "so what?" is that I want to go cruising!  I'm planning for a life of swimsuits, sundresses, and shorts.  (We are completely dismissing my husband's want to sail up to Alaska.)  And my once weekly shaving routine just isn't going to cut it.  Never mind the fact that I really don't want to shave on a boat every day.  I just don't trust myself w/ a razor at anchor.  I'm a tad accident prone.  I'll tell you later about the time I shaved off my fingernail.  (I'll give you a second to cringe and shudder for a second.)
I've thought about Nair, which I do love...  But again, it's something that I would have to do once a week and I also think that the chemicals in Nair probably (and by probably I mean definitely) not good for the environment. 
And then I discovered the joys of regular waxing. I used to get my legs waxed in the summers, once a month, but I always did it at a salon and it just got too expensive. And then I was introduced to the wonderful - at home - New Surgi Wax roll on system. **sigh of relief**.
I've tried at home waxing before, and it never worked. This stuff is fabulous, it works like a dream. Ok, so yeah, the first few times hurt. But after that, the hair grows back only 1/4 to 1/2 as thick (I'm killing off hair follicles by the thousands, mwaaa haa haa ha). And it's lighter and softer. I've decided that if I wax enough, I may possibly kill off every hair on the entire lower half of my body. Don't you dare go ruining my dream by telling me it's not going to happen. I have dreams, I have hopes, I have goals!!!!
But more importantly I have legs that I don't have to shave every day. I waxed 2 weeks ago, and unless you get very close and look - you can't tell I have any leg hair. I keep saying that it's the little things in life that bring us joy. Ahhhh, no leg hair, what joy!

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